Spent the weekend picking apart why the story was awful and I think it was just flowing too slowly. I can only imagine the reader getting bored and turning to the next story. So, I'm going to try to get everything I have typed up (4K words) down to 500 to 1K words. That'll ratchet up the tension and it should flow better. *hopes* Okay, now I just need to get to lunch so I can write it.